Merch
We have decided to hold off on the physical products that we eventually intend to provide until we actually have them in stock and can ship them on demand. It is absolutely our intent to offer the physical products below as soon as we are able to do so. For now, we are only offering the digital download to purchase.
The physical items inspired by the book may be seen after the available download. If you would like to purchase any of the following products, the best thing you could do is purchase the $5 digital download and/or donate to our GoFundMe effort (there is a link at the bottom of our ‘Main’ homepage. We intend to use those revenues to purchase our first shipment.
The debit/credit card option may be seen at the actual checkout area. (The “theme” of the website software doesn’t make that clear.)
Additionally, the debit/credit card processor has some unusual wording about future billing from Acadia Trading Co LLC (our official name). This is a standard statement they make–it certainly doesn’t apply to us. We will never charge you for anything after your order is complete, to be clear. We don’t have your financial information and you are not in any kind of “subscription”. You will never be charged by us after your order is complete. That is, unless you come back and specifically wish to buy something (once we offer the below physical products for sale). Their statement would cause us concern, personally, so we wanted to make it very clear. We also added a personal statement (the only one we made) in the legal section–everything else is from a standard compliance download–that makes it very clear in our Terms & Conditions: we will never charge you again unless you wish to buy something else and specifically ask to do so. Thank you.
Showing the single result
Showing the single result
Upcoming Merchandise Preview
We’re currently researching the following merchandise to spread the satire, imagery, and spirit of the Donald the Pig character in our book. The main focus of our research is the quality of the merchandise. That is the takeaway that we ask you to remember. It is very important, to us, that these items last decades, not merely through the Trump presidency. (Hopefully, those two timelines are not the same time span.) These are early-stage mock-ups and are not actual images of the products, but the images provide an illustration of the various items.
Physical Book
A professionally bound hardcover edition featuring the full narrative and illustrations from the Donald the Pig Thought He Was a King book. We intend to use the highest quality materials and produce the book in a 8x8 or a 10x8 format for those who wish to read it to their children. We also believe that such a format would make it a distinctive coffee table book.
Graphic T-Shirts
High-quality cotton tees will be available in the two designs. The shirts we will source will be the sort that last decades, not mere years. We tried to write our book with some kind of historical perspective. As such, we want all of our physical items to be timeless.
Embroidered Baseball Caps
Structured caps with embroidered slogans and imagery. As with the other items, we will strive to ensure that the final product is of the highest quality.
Ceramic Coffee Mugs
Durable ceramic mugs featuring the "Donald the Pig" and "Donald Is a Pig" imagery. Perfect for your morning brew or as a gag gift to your Trump-loving pig boss.
Floating Image Pen
This concept pen is designed to be both weighty and visually engaging. This pen is the one item that we personally want for ourselves (other than the physical book, of course). We will ensure that it is crafted with a thick, weighty body, hilarious imagery, and of the highest quality. One side will show a confident Trump pose in a full suit with his arms akimbo (hands on side with elbows sticking out), while the reverse reveals a satirical transformation into a naked Donald the Pig with tiny hoofs covering his private area. Mind you, the hoofs will be so tiny as to leave little room to conjecture. The caption will be “The Emperor Has No Clothes.” The imagery will be tastefully rendered to maintain humor without crossing into explicit territory.
About the Headshot Design:
Since the following items are mock-ups, the end products will be slightly different than the particular images displayed. The floating pen is a special project and we will create a unique image of a cool pen that is funny (and thick and weighty…that’s important to us, too). We’re wary to make a poll for a website like this (due to the horde of nazis out there).
So, we’ve decided to do it this way: There are two pictures below. #1 we call “Nostalgia” and #2 we call “Modernized”. If you care, email us at therealdonaldthepig@gmail.com – We will only read the subject line so don’t write anything in the main text area, please. Simply state the item type (t-shirt, cap, mug) and which you prefer. Examples: SUBJECT LINE: t-shirt, #2. Another way: SUBJECT LINE: t-shirt, modernized. That’s it! We should be able to sift through the bs, even if the right inundates our inbox.
Thanks for understanding. The whole merch thing is gimmicky, by design. We don’t think most people will care too much which design they receive, but if you have a strong inclination toward one over the other, take a moment to tell us. Pay attention only to the headshot, the actual statement ("Donald the Pig" or "Donald Is a Pig") is product specific. Thank you.
Design Options
#1 Nostalgia
#2 Modernized
